Teach Your Sons & Daughters
There are critical things parents MUST teach their sons and daughters if they must get married and remain married, for good.
Teach your sons that marriage is about standing up to responsibility. It’s not about settling down with someone to be served.
Teach your sons that marriage is about maintaining order and giving directions that empower the family. Teach your son never to mistake romance for love. Love is strict, love demands responsibility, accountability, and love disciplines, but does not punish. There is a difference.
Teach your sons to learn to be firm on what they know is right for the family and never to give in to emotional blackmail.
Teach your daughters that the first law of marriage is submission. If they have learnt it or are not willing to submit, they must not get married. Teach them to respect their husbands, not because the husbands are always right in all things, but because divine rule demands the wife to respect and submit.
Teach your daughters that marriage is not a democracy. It’s a place of order and authority. The husband is the authority figure and responsible for order.
Teach your daughters that when they get married, they can only advise and make suggestions to their husbands. It is not for them to direct their husbands on what to do or how to do things in the home. The wife can only give advice and suggestions. It lies with the husband to take, to adjust or to reject the advice or suggestions. This is very tricky!
Teach your daughters that marriage is more than a partnership business. Someone and only one person holds the authority – the husband. This must be drummed into her head and her heart.
Teach your sons never to bully or beat up their wives, no matter the provocation. Teach them to walk away from provocative situations.
Teach your daughters never to compare their husbands with other husbands. Each husbandman is different and is dealing with different realities of life.
Teach your daughters to watch what they say to their husbands. They can build or destroy their man with their words. Words have more implications in marriage than outside of it.
Teach your daughters to be mindful of their crave for fancy and fantasies. Marriage is a place of reality, not a place of ideals 💡 Teach them to be weary of social pressures to keep up with the latest fads in clothes, shoes, and fashion.
Teach your sons to take the welfare of the family seriously, but never to do that at the expense of their own lives. It’s only a living husband that can support his family.
Teach your daughters that when they marry, the money they earn does not belong to them, but belongs to the family. Teach them not to see their husbands as the sole providers for the family upkeep. Teach them to see themselves as responsible and joyful contributors to family upkeep, not as a favor done, but as a duty and obligation.
Teach your daughters never to put their children’s welfare way ahead of their husbands. Children are gifts from God and visitors to the home. They come, the are trained, then they leave. The husband and wife stay, till death do them part.
Teach your sons and daughters to be domestic, ready and able to carry out any domestic work, including cooking, washing dishes, cleaning the house, and whatever. Teach them that family life is dynamic and family roles can change anytime without notice. If the husband or the wife is not prepared to step in when situations change, life could become unnecessarily difficult.
Teach them about role-switching.
Teach them that marriage is for those who are ready to love without questions and to submit without reservations.
Teach your sons to support their wives and never to be intimidated by their successes. Teach your daughters to support their husbands dreams and vision, even if they don’t understand the vision.
Teach your daughters that their husbands is their head. The same care and attention they give to look after their hair that covers their head, they should also give the same attention and care to their husbands. Tell them to always ask themselves this question: As I do my hair to look nice, what am I doing to make my husband, who is my head, to look nice? Am doing enough?
Finally, teach your sons to learn to take responsibility. Teach your daughters to learn to also take responsibility. Everyone must learn to do what they ought to do.
These you must teach them. Write these out. Post it to them.
May your children, the next generation of husbands and wives, be prepared to give us good homes and raise us quality children than we did.
Rev. Dr. Joseph C. Ibekwe
Family Life Coach
email: jibekwe907@gmail.com
